The thought of life after divorce can be the worst. You probably wouldn’t imagine dating, getting intimate, and even finding love again after divorce. But it’s possible to start again and rebuild an incredible life far much more than you ever expected as long as you take time and allow yourself to heal completely.
There are no rules for dating, relationships, and sex post-divorce, but it’s usually intertwined with an ex, heartbreak, children, and in-laws. Jumping immediately into dating or a relationship won’t resolve pent up emotions, insecurities, conflicts, and anger. That’s why it’s important to work on yourself first before getting yourself out there, no matter how long it takes. In this article, we’ll take a look at how to start life after divorce. Let’s jump right in.
Entering The Dating Scene
You don’t have to think about dating and marriage in the same sentence. Instead, choose to look at it as a learning experience. Expect that this new chapter of your life after divorce will come with its own challenges. Also, don’t compare the person you’re with to your ex or think that if you change what your former spouse didn’t like, the new person will be happy.
This is also a good time to fire up those dating sites. Despite all the horror stories you might have heard from friends or family, the best dating sites are genuine places for finding someone special.
Are You Ready For A Relationship Post-Divorce?
Certain signs tell you whether you’re ready for a relationship after divorce:
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You’ve accepted your past and hold no resentment, disappointment, or anger towards your ex or past relationship.
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You have a positive outlook on life and become increasingly productive both in your work and personal life.
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You’ve answered yes to the question, ‘can life be better after divorce?’
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You have become confident in yourself despite being divorced.
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You’ve stopped dwelling on the past and are eager for what the future holds.
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You’re hopeful every time you think about the possibility of meeting someone new.
You can only start a new relationship if you notice these signs. Remember, falling in love right after divorce is as simple as falling out of love when you’re in a fresh relationship.
Sex After Divorce
Let’s admit it, if you’ve just ended a marriage, you’ve probably wondered if you’re ever going to be comfortable enough to undress in front of somebody else or get intimate with them. It could take time, or you might be ready a week after your partner moves out. What matters is to move at your own speed. Recognize whether you’re ready for sex or ready for love, and understand the difference before you get back in the game.
The first sex after divorce can feel strange and awkward because you’re out of your comfort zone. Even for the most confident person, post-divorce first sex can make you anxious about body parts you see as imperfect. Ultimately, most people become excited at the thought of having sex after a dry spell. It’s possible to simply focus on the positive emotions through all the negative sentiments, and enjoy the fun and excitement that comes with being intimate.
Also, think of fear as a limitation that prevents you from feeling wanted and having a desire towards another individual, which are all great sources of energy. At the end of the day, it’s important to only have sex with someone because you really want to. In your moment of vulnerability, you wouldn’t want to feel pressured or short-changed in any way.
The Takeaway
Without sugar coating it, whether it’s life after divorce for men or life after divorce for women, the thought of starting from scratch can be overwhelming. Many people who enter into a marriage don’t have intentions of living the single life again. However, things don’t always turn out the way we hoped they would.
As soon as the ink dries on your divorce papers, it’s not all gloom and doom. Life after divorce is great. A slew of new opportunities for your future will come in the form of dating, relationships, and sex. While you might not know when you’re truly ready to get back out there, the tips above will put you on the right track and show you that life after divorce is eventually sane. Have any of these tips been helpful for you post-divorce? Or, what are you doing differently in finding you’re happily ever after? Please let us know in the comments.
